Once upon a time, there was a rich farmer, who was as thick as a brick. He had no children, but he did own an ox and a donkey. The farmer had often heard that one could become really smart at the university, and this idea intrigued him more every day.

One day, a prankster said to him, "Well, would you believe that they can even turn stupid animals into intelligent human beings at the university?"

"You don't say ... ," the farmer replied. "Well, in that case I would like to try it. My ox is so bright that if I say' giddyup, giddyup' to the donkey, the ox is already walking in the right direction."

So the farmer took his ox to the university. I suppose he went to Leyden. Once there, the farmer rang a doorbell at random and a student opened the door. The farmer said that he wanted to see the professor, because he wanted to sign up his ox for university. Well, the student didn't go for any professor, but informed a senior student.

The senior went to the farmer and said to him, "It's okay; my friend, you can leave your ox here."

The farmer asked how much that would cost him.

"Seventy guilders."

The farmer paid and the ox stayed in Leyden. After a month, the farmer thought, I should pay the ox a visit to see how he is coming along. He travelled to Leyden, but the ox wasn't home; he had gone to class. The farmer learned that the ox was making much progress, but more money was needed. That's how it went, every time the farmer came to Leyden.

After the farmer had paid like this for a year and a half, without even seeing his beloved animal once, he became mad and demanded his ox back.

"That's funny," the student said. "Didn't he write to you then? He has to do his exams, and I suppose he will pass, but it will cost you money."

"Oh, all right then," the farmer conceded, "but this will be the last time."

So he paid another hundred guilders. Since he still got neither word nor sign from the ox, he returned to Leyden once more, determined to take him back home. He met the same student again.

"I don't understand," the student said. "Did he fail to write to you once more? He passed his exam and he has already found a splendid job: He became mayor of Amsterdam."

"The rascal!" the farmer exclaimed. "I'll get him for that, wait and see!"

So he went to Amsterdam. It so happened that the mayor was called Ox. The farmer rang his doorbell and asked if the mayor was home.

"Yes," the servant answered, and asked what the farmer wanted.

"Well," the farmer said. "I am his boss and I want to take him home."

Of course, the servant did not understand a word and thought the farmer was a lunatic. The two started arguing. Then the mayor himself arrived and told the servant to keep calm. The farmer was allowed inside.

Well, then he had to tell about his ox and the university, and finally he said, "I will put on your bridle now, to take you home, so that the wife can see you."

Even for the mayor this went way too far, and he threw the farmer out.

Dispirited, the farmer went back home, and when he arrived, he said to his wife, "Truly, there are clever people in Leyden, because our ox turned into a learned man. Still, there's no benefit or joy in it,

For if a nobody

Becomes somebody

It spells sorrow for everybody."