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Prevuius group

Group No. 240


Letter

X. Humor

Group No.

X300 – X499

Group name

Humor of social classes: . Humor dealing with professions

Description

X300. Humor dealing with professions.
 
X310. Jokes on lawyers. (Cf. P422.)
 
X311. What will happen when there are so many lawyers. Woman sees the crowds of students in the law school. She knows that the one lawyer in her village has ruined nearly everyone. *Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 787; *Wesselski Bebel I 216 No. 110.
 
X312. Beggar frightens lawyer into giving by telling him of all the lawyers in hell. Spanish: Boggs FFC XC 95 No. 819*; cf. U.S.: Baughman.
 
X313. Dying like Christ – between two thieves. The dying man has the lawyer and the notary stand on either side of him. U.S.: Baughman; Spanish: Boggs FFC XC 134 No. 1583*.
 
X314. Lawyer who tries to practice without lying fails. He enters religious order and tries to conduct the legal business without lying. *Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 127; Crane Vitry 155 No. 52; Scala Celi 7b No. 47; Alphabet No. 483.
 
X315. Dying lawyer says, I appeal. Crane Vitry 149f. No. 39; Scala Celi 7b No. 48; Herbert III 77 No. 200, 462 No. 94, 497 No. 238, 499 No. 262; Alphabet No. 41; Mensa Philosophica No. 147.
 
X315.1. Dying lawyer asks delay. Crane Vitry 150 No. 40; Scala Celi 7b No. 45; Mensa Philosophica No. 148.
 
X316. Nero has reserved place in hell for lawyers. Crane Vitry 148 No. 36; Spanish Exempla: Keller.
 
X317. Lawyer thrown back into mud when rescuers learn that he is a lawyer. Mensa Philosophica No. 37.
 
X318. Lawyer loses tongue in death because he sold it in life. Alphabet No. 40.
 
X319. Miscellaneous jokes about lawyers.
 
X319.1. Eloquent lawyer makes obviously guilty client doubt his own guilt. Canada, U.S.: *Baughman.
 
X330. Jokes on magistrates. (Cf. P421.)
 
X331. Guilty of everything connected with the seven senses. When the priest to whom he is confessing says there are but five senses, the magistrate says that he needs two more senses than other people. Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 297.
 
X332. Foreigner wonders why city with so many judges has not been destroyed. Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X350. Jokes on teachers.
 
X351. Music teacher charges double for those who have taken music before. One fee for teaching and one for making them forget the old teaching. Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 314.
 
X370. Jokes on scholars.
 
X371. Master of seven liberal arts begs from wagoner. With his one art latter supports his family. Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 855.
 
X372. Jokes on doctors. U.S.: Baughman; Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X372.1. Doctor cures palpitation of heart: patient stops breathing. India: Thompson-Balys.
 
X372.2. Head cut off to cure snakebite. India: Thompson-Balys.
 
X372.3. Eyedrops prescribed for stomach ache so that patient can see what he eats. India: *Thompson-Balys.
 
X372.4. Foolish doctor performs useless operation.
 
X372.4.1. Man with cheeks stuffed with food operated on to remove swellings. India: *Thompson-Balys.
 
X372.5. Doctor called to attend sick man immediately gives orders for the funeral. India: Thompson-Balys.
 
X410. Jokes on parsons. *Types 1725 – 1824; **Kristensen Vore FР¶dres Kirketjeneste (Aarhus, 1899); *Fb prР¶st II 884a; West Indies: Flowers 583.
 
X411. Parson put to flight during his sermon. Type 1785.
 
X411.1. Sexton's dog steals sausage from parson's pocket: parson flees. *Type 1785A.
 
X411.2. Sexton puts needle in sacramental bread: parson sticks his hand. *Type 1785B.
 
X411.3. Sexton arranges wasp-nest so that parson sits on it. Wasps chase him. *Type 1785C.
 
X412. Tame bear tied to church bells. Rings alarm. Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X413. One-eyed parson in dimly lighted church joins the wrong couples. Marries the old man to the girl and the old woman to the boy. Italian Novella: *Rotunda.
 
X414. Parson rides ox into church. He wants to show how Christ rode into Jerusalem. Sexton sticks ox with needle. *Type 1786.
 
X415. The hog in church. Locked in church all week by mistake. When the congregation comes, the hog runs between the parson's legs and carries him out. *Type 1838; Fb svin.
 
X416. Parson preaches so that half the congregation weeps and half laughs. Has clothes torn in the back. Those that see this laugh. He wins the wager. *Type 1828*; Wesselski Morlini 297 No. 44.
 
X417. altarbread. The parson preaches, What is the life of man? and therewith brings his hand down on the altar-bread: Pure butter! Type 1836*.
 
X418. Parson is to let a dove fly in the church. It dies in his pocket. *Type 1837.
 
X421. At the blessing of the grave the parson's ox breaks loose: Now the devil has him. *Type 1840; *Fb tyr III 908b.
 
X422. The corpse with his feet cut off. The coffin-maker has fitted him to the coffin. The parson: On the last day he will arise. One of the coffin-makers: Did I say that? Type 1699*.
 
X424. The devil in the cemetery. A sexton hears thieves in the cemetery cracking nuts and thinks it is the devil cracking bones. With the gouty parson on his back he comes upon the thieves who, thinking it is their companion with the sheep, call out, Is he fat? The sexton: Fat or lean, here he is! *Type 1791; *BP III 395; *Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 82; Scala Celi 101b No. 547; Alphabet No. 333; U.S., England: *Baughman; Lithuanian: Balys Index No. 1791, Legends No. 889.
 
X424.1. Robbers mistake man for devil (the sheep speaks, Gently, gently!). India: Thompson-Balys.
 
X425. The parson who said there is no devil. The bear-showman lets the bear climb up the pulpit. The parson thinks the bear is the devil. Type 1745*.
 
X426. If his son were only a fool he would let him study to be a priest. So says the innkeeper. Type 1865*.
 
X427. A bad year for priests: few funerals. All but the priest rejoice over the good health of the community. He bemoans his loss of income from burials. *Wesselski Arlotto II 248 No. 155.
 
X428. Enmity between priests and monks: chickens and eggs. Monks eat eggs and make chickens expensive; priests eat hens and make eggs high. Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 69.
 
X431. The hungry parson and the porridge-pot. Overnight at the peasant's house. The hungry parson hunts the porridge in the dark, guided by a rope the sexton has given him. Series of accidents. *Type 1775; Fb seng III 187a.
 
X431.1. Stupid man tries to take honey from jug at night while visiting. Series of accidents. Chinese: Graham.
 
X434. The parson put out of countenance.
 
X434.1. The large loaves need a large oven. Parson says that the loaves with which Jesus fed the people in the wilderness were as large as the mountains. The mason asks what kind of oven they were baked in. Type 1834*.
 
X434.2. Grace before meat. The parson asks the boy: What does your father say when you begin to eat? Boy: You young devil, etc. *Type 1841.
 
X435. The boy applies the sermon. Makes a present application of the words of the parson. *Type 1833; U.S.: Baughman.
 
X435.1. What says David? – Boy: Pay your old debts. Variants: (a) What evil did Adam do? – He (shoemaker) made my shoes too small. (b) What kind of man was Moses? He was a day laborer. *Type 1833A; *Wesselski Arlotto II 233 No. 113.
 
X435.2. Parson Where did the father stay? – He stayed to hold the oxen. *Type 1833B.
 
X435.3. Parson: Where was Christ when he was neither in heaven nor on earth? – He was in the willow-grove looking for a stick to beat those who ask foolish questions. *Type 1833C.
 
X435.4. Names of persons in the Trinity. The priest's example: the three cows. The boy: The Holy Ghost has just had a calf. Type 1833D; England: Baughman.
 
X435.5. Sermon about the rich man. A boy rides with a rich man. Goes into church and leaves his coat lying on the sled. When the parson preaches about the rich man who went to hell, the boy calls out, Then he took my coat along! *Type 1832.
 
X436. The parson sings like a goat. The parson sees an old woman weeping and believes that she is touched by his singing. When spoken to she says that she has been reminded of her old goat which she has lost. *Type 1834; Wesselski Hodscha Nasreddin II 243 No. 539; *Crane Vitry 157 No. 56; *Pauli (ed. Bolte) No. 576; Fb prРdiken II 882; Scala Celi 25a No. 164; – Italian Novella: Rotunda; India: Thompson-Balys.
 
X438. The dream: all parsons in hell. The smith tells the parson whom he has summoned that he has dreamed of going to heaven where St. Peter would not admit him before he saw a parson. There were no parsons in heaven, but all in hell. *Type 1738.
 
X438.1. All devout women in hell. Devout woman and a priest retell their dreams. The priest has dreamed that all the devout women are to be found in hell. Lithuanian: Balys Index No. 1847*.
 
X441. Parson and sexton at mass. Parson intones instructions to the sexton (cook) as a part of the mass. *Type 1831; Spanish: Boggs FFC XC 147 No. 1831A*.
 
X441.1. I can't hear you. Rector confesses his sacristan: Have you drunk the wine designated for the mass? – I can't hear you. Exchange of places. Sacristan asks rector: Have you kissed my wife? – Really, I can't hear you. Lithuanian: Balys Index No. 2451*; Rumanian: Schullerus FFC LXXVIII No. 1777*.
 
X442. Whistling at mass. Bell breaks and priest's patron whistles in place of ringing the bell at mass. *Wesselski Arlotto I 187 No. 7.
 
X443. Parson's poor horsemanship.
 
X443.1. Chaplain on bucking mule. Nouvelles RР№crР№ations No. 27.
 
X445. Parson refreshes himself during the sermon.
 
X445.1. Parson takes a drink of liquor during the sermon. (Cf. X111.13.) *Type 1827.
 
X445.2. Parson takes a chew of tobacco during the sermon. Fb kardus II 91a.
 
X451. Cock crows at church and the sexton awakes and begins to sing. *Type 1828.
 
X452. The parson has no need to preach. Those who know may teach those who don't know. *Type 1826.
 
X452.1. No need to give sermon about saint again. Last year I told you all about his life and works. He has performed no new miracles. *Wesselski Arlotto I 188 No. 8; Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X453. The woman whose name was Worthy. Refuses to say, I'm not worthy at communion. Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X454. Chapel endowed with fifty blows for the friar. Italian Novella: Rotunda.
 
X457. Jokes on monks.
 
X457.1. Bishop willing to admit castrated man as monk: wishes all were in the same condition. Nouvelles RР№crР№ations No. 15.
 
X459. Jokes on parsons – miscellaneous. England, U.S.: *Baughman.
 
X459.1. Man heeds what he thinks to be call to the ministry.
 
X459.1.1. Young man plowing corn sees letters P. C. formed by clouds. He explains situation to minister, asks to be ordained. The minister explains that the letters mean plow corn instead of preach Christ. U.S.: Baughman.
 
X460. Humor concerning other professions.
 
X461. Jokes on fortune-tellers.
 
X461.1. Fortune-teller shows others how to get rich but remains poor himself. (Cf. J1062.) Herbert III 22 No. 186; Crane Vitry 250 No. 266.

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